September 30th, Georgia, 2019

September 30, 2019

She rises in the dark

feels her way to the comfort spot on the porch and listens

The insects and tree frogs are more faint, slower

Why do tears form in the outer corner of her eyes?

An occasional yellow poplar leaf drifts from the sky.

school buses have been running for a month

past the autumn equinox

even as the thermometer will reach 92 today

Still, she pines

grieves even

for the passsage of time

for the end of a season

 

 

 

Glasses and Vision

September 29, 2019

She wears her new progressive lens proudly

needs them night and day

but they limit sight

the frames block the periphery

the nuances

the shadows and truth

she is accustomed to, slant

the shiny new glass now smeared with her fingerprints

Why would 20 20 vision cause her distress?

Because she is used to intuition

sees through many senses

the heart

a keen mind

a willing spirit

She knows deer slowly cross the lane

feels their hooves in vibration

while her eyes fail her

the new lens.

 

tow-headed

four

she easily climbs the washing machine

on the linoleum floor

her goal-the sugar bowl

spoon by spoon

she scoops the granulated sweetness

white as her hair

into a pink mouth

oblivious to her father in the next room

young and angry at this stage

and hell bent on beating

truth from his children

he asks but already knows the answer

“Sadie, what are you doing?”

“I’m in the kitchen” her little voice declares

It is true. She is in the kitchen.

“But what are you doing in the kitchen?”

the bass voice like an inquisition

“I’m in the kitchen”

her mantra continues

and thus it went

the same question

the same answer

And then a belt

her father-a good man

but not mellowed yet

fiercely bent on integrity

throws her across the bed

the leather stings

as sugar drools down her chin

and tears ferment

 

 

 

 

 

Ballroom Shoes, Suede Soles

September 28, 2019

My new coppery ballroom dance shoes are strappy with a heel

Sexy and a good color.

The instructor helps me put them on

I learn Tango, Rhumba, Waltz, Foxtrot..

We party Fridays

Drink wine

change partners

dance till we sweat

Yes, I miss my cowgirl boots,

hooping and hollering

stomping and letting loose..

But maybe -as Electric Cowboy closes and we grieve-

it is time for smooth

suede gliding

long extended legs

form and balance

stellar posture and elegance

I am thankful to have discovered a new way to dance!!!

Habit

September 27, 2019

4 AM

Front porch

3 deer cross the road

newspaper lands

jogger passes

Train whistles

prayer

scripture

journal

blog

make up bed

medicine

wash face

Coke Zero

same parking space

exercise

church on Sunday

same pew with Mama

Dance on Friday

call friends, siblings

cook

eat dinner

watch TV

read

sleep

Now added-

ESL Tuesdays

Photography development black and white Wednesday

Poetry workshop Saturday

Ballroom lesson Thursday

no book club or bridge

no supper club or regular bar

Just life

hiking with Mary

Bloody Mary’s with Neill

PBS with Mom

knitting

Soon, spinning will be added

and longer runs

Soon, lake swims will end and Health Place will substitute

Soon, a Lover will emerge

like images in developer

the negative turned bright

Alpaca

September 27, 2019

I weave Alpaca wool with tenderness

with each turn of the needle

for brothers

sisters

friends

Multi-green fibers cling to my black dress

but I don’t mind

Part of what I weave

is part of me

and visa versa

Presence.

Presence and peace

while needles click in repetition

Like riding a horse

rocking

It is a rhythmic practice

a prayer

A Book and a Pillow

September 26, 2019

I’m a snob about literature

and have discovered so many good reads lately..

The Great Alone, Where the Crawdads Sing, My Absolute Darling, Harry’s Trees, All the Light We Cannot See, Wild, The Book Lady of Troublesome Creek..

The themes seem to blend -and the characters -between reads

all speaking in my head their truths.

many coming of age books about young women

their suffering and strength

I read on my left side, the bedside light illuminating as I quickly turn the pages

hungry

starved for more

my head on the pillow

It’s a wonder I don’t have callouses

Books, stories, words are miracles

taking us into worlds we otherwise would not know

I am happy on my bed, good book in hand

A great way to spend retirement

Time to go home, snuggle in, and read!

later..

 

 

 

Transition Time

September 25, 2019

I completed my 7th triathlon on Sunday in Florence, Alabama. A hard course, but I did it!

In official events, each sport is timed.. and so are the transitions.

One can lose much time in transitioning from the swim to cycling particularly, but also from cycling to the run.

The idea is to hurry from out of the water to where your bike is and things are laid out ready to put on, pull up your bike shorts, put on your gloves, socks, bike shoes, sunglasses, and helmet..then scurry out to where you can start the ride.

Likewise, when you return from the cycling, you park your bike, take off helmet, gloves, sunglasses, bike shoes, and put on your running shoes..then start the third portion of the triathlon.

When I train, I practice this part too.. with shoes unlaced, gloves facing the right direction..

I believe this transition is a metaphor for my-and probably others- transition to retirement. It takes some time. One cannot simply hop out of a lifetime of work and jump into the new life.

I think I’m getting there..but need continued patience, practice, and time to NOT hurry..yet keep moving forward.

God bless all who are in transition!

Love,

Patty

The Old Surgeon

September 16, 2019

fingers

gnarled

arthritic

perform surgery

in the air

cut fine wobbly lines

from a leather chair

Titrate

September 14, 2019

I stand like a scientist

over a petri dish

Test tube in hand

counting drops

Lifelines

Each day decreasing by one

I’m making it

Breathing

Settling into a new life

God help me reach zero!